April 2013
1 post
Apr 14th
January 2013
1 post
17 tags
Jan 2nd
December 2012
2 posts
7 tags
Dec 31st
1 note
14 tags
Howdy Ho
Hey! Just thought I’d update my random followers, I haven’t had interwebs in a while, so that’s why I haven’t posted anything in forever, but basically I’m writing a book. I’ve been trying to find a topic for a long time and I found it last night sooo :) I’ll be publishing a book sometime in the future. Either that, or, after sending it to every publishing...
Dec 31st
June 2012
1 post
13 tags
Deer
Some women are like deer, you just wanna chop their head off and mount them…
Jun 15th
May 2012
19 posts
17 tags
May 30, 2012 Mini-Rant
I don’t like the phrase “i don’t believe in it”. Not about things like mythical creatures and religion and things like that. I mean about things that obviously exist… Things like marrige and suicide. They exist…they aren’t like unicorns. Say I don’t like the idea because I don’t believe in is idiotic and you shoulda been swallowed at birth… -Love Philip, Kiss Kiss
May 30th
22 tags
Dear technology,
Why did you have to advance so fast? Why couldn’t we have stuck with pagers and pay phones? Mobile phones are annoying… allowing everyone to get a hold of you anytime they want. What if I don’t want to talk to those people? What’s up with auto-correct? Always trying to guess what I’m saying. Why can’t I just send a made up word to somebody without having to...
May 23rd
23 tags
Are you... freaking... kidding me...
So I’ve been watching South Park and I got to the Scientology episode, “I’m trapped in the closet”… I looked up Scientology… and found this…                  A long denied story about the Basis of the beliefs of Scientology have finally been admitted by a senior member of the church. A core doctrine of Scientology belief is that freeing the human body of...
May 23rd
3 notes
18 tags
5
Papa: "...and I'm like where'd you get all those bruises and he's like I got in a fight with five n***as."
Mandy: "Dad!"
Papa: "That's what he said!"
Mandy: "Jeremiah!"
Jeremiah: "What!?"
May 21st
May 20th
2 notes
Jerry: "Sorry u can talk to jen she doesnt like me anyway I put my anti-dyke spray on today."
Me: "HA!"
May 19th
13 tags
May 19th
30,553 notes
13 tags
My voice
Sounds like Jack Johnson×John Mayer÷(√Jason Mraz×90000)
May 17th
11 tags
“*achoo* “Oh God it went everywhere!” -A. Jacob Sears”
May 12th
16 tags
“I’m a commander, I can’t just sit around and masturbate all...”
May 12th
8 tags
Why're you even a country?
Jen: She still wants to argue it with you. She says look at Canadian history.
Me: Does Canada even have history? Why are you still even a country!?
Jen: *Laughing* Shut up!
May 11th
2 notes
14 tags
May 5th
12 tags
May 5th
4 notes
6 tags
May 3rd
29 notes
15 tags
May 2nd
30 tags
May 2nd
15 notes
30 tags
May 2nd
13 notes
13 tags
"Germoan"
Dallas: "We're Germoan. That's it."
Joshua: "So we surf and kill Jews?"
May 2nd
1 note
17 tags
May 2nd
20 notes